what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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they told me not to write here but i did

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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