So FDR walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? After hours of waiting for the perfect victim, the boy spotted an elderly woman walking down the sidewalk. The clock barreled through the air, hitting the old woman on the head at extremely high speeds. She was immediately killed on contact.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Englishman, an American and a Frenchman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Englishman jumps off the cliff. The American also jumps off the cliff. He is followed by the Frenchman. Suicide and depression are major problems in today's world regardless of nationality.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What do you call four black guys hanging in a barn? A: Farm tools

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why couldn't the bicycle stand up on it's own? because it was two tired

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There once was a little girl called maddie who had a very earisponaceable daddy, she was taken from her bed and now she is dead and was raped by a Portuguese tranny

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

spell backwards: taco cat

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the goose say to the other goose? Honk!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock, knock Who's there? A social worker, we are taking your children into costody because your wife has reported you to the police for molesting them.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What should you do if you are being chased by a black man. keep running and if he tag's you, then you should try tag him back since this is a simple game of tag.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops