Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

Why did the plane crash? Because there was no pilot

How did the two friends cross the busy road? They couldn't, because that would be considered jay-walking

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

What did the muffin say to the cup cake? nothing, muffins can't talk, and cup cakes can't hear.

What is red and green and goes round and round? A frog in a blender!

What do you call a baby girl that has grown up? A women

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

why did corey cross the road? the green man flashed.

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

Can i have a Ice Cream Kuhn?

whats ironic about a white van being white the driver usualy is not

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

scraggle is in you pillow case

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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