What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

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Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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What do you call a black man that has just gotten out of jail? A former criminal who has served his time in prison and is now trying to redeem himself by becoming a respectable member of his community

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What's faster than a black man carrying your TV? The law enforcement that promptly catches him and is about to charges him with theft regardless of his ethnicity because stealing someone else's property is just generally an unlawful thing to do.

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

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why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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