Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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A woman woke up next to her husband that was already awake. She said "F*** you" and walked out of the house. On the other side of the world, a horse is giving birth to a chihuahua.

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What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

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A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

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knock knock? Whos there? a questionable person. What? exactly.

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Why is the alien dead as a door-nail? Because the door-nail was never alive nor could it ever be dead therefore the alien must have never existed just like the life and death of the door-nail.

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WNBA

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A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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How many baby's does it take to paint a wall Depends on how hard you throw them

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some people say that i am gay they are right cause i like boys

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Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

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ure mama's so fat

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fun fact for the day: 100% of people that drink water die sooner or later

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NASCAR being considered a sport.

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Q:When do you club a newborn baby? A:Whenever you want to because babies are stupid

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What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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