Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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What do you call a person from China? Chinese, duh.

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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WILLYS

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

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minorities.....

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a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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