Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. They never got their answer, because god doesn't exist.

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Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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which one is easiest

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Superman vs Batman real fight: Batman: Hmm I believe that Superman might want to fight m*squish* Batman explodes in a bunch of meat as a blue and red blur is seen fly by. Extended Edition: Batman: Hah Superman I got kryptonite gloves so if you would just stand close to them for about five minute...*squish* Batsack of meat left we see nothing because Superman is FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET. They are probably gonna go like every fucking crossover, first they squabble and throw a few punches for five minutes, then they realize that the LAX LADDER LEX LUGER AND LEX LUTHOR brothers made up some fake story so sups and bts kill each other while they blow up the world, so Btz, and Soup end up beating them up... Moral: "PFF! BATMAN HAS BEATEN UP SUPERMAN AND THE HULK IN THOUSANDS OF SHlTTY NON CANON STORIES!" (In where the one with the Hulk described the hulk to have the instincts and combat skills of a "dumb, animal like confused ape" yes actual quote, Batman punched this confused green ape across a door and kept beating "The Hulk" up as he ran around in "animalistic fear and "rage" receiving random kicks by Batman, then Btz throws some capsule that turns into a fishbowl with no oxygen that chokes The Hulk (supposedly to death) in a few seconds... The Hulk can like hold his breath for YEARS in space, (but you know these lethal fishbowls)

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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Your momma is such a slut, that she has unprotected sexual intercouse several times throughout any given day, with many different men.

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Why didn't Anne Frank ever leave the attic? She did.

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How old are you? 7

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A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

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Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the first monkey? why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure.

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How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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