Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

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A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

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whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

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Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

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Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

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Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

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Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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How many baby's does it take to paint a wall Depends on how hard you throw them

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woman's rights

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Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

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Women's rights.

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

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Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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