Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved

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What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

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My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

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Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

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23

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds inside your apple.

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What's worse than being arrested? Being arrested twice

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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your mom

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What hurts like hell? HELL

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the head repeatedly

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ahmadinejad. Well then get the **** away from my door!

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? No one laughs at your jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops