What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

Equal rights!

Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

I'm going to Re-write History... History

yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

Q.what happens if a fat man see's a black man? A. the fat man eats the black man thinking that he was chocolate

What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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