Waiter. there's a fly in my soup! I apologize, I'll bring you a new one immediately.

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What's more painful than having your girlfriend cheat on you and leave you? Having your **** bitten off slowly.

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Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

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Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust? What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

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what do u call a 7th grade ninga joe waldeaker the sarah freek

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NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

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Everyone is equal. It doesn't matter if you're black, red, yellow, brown, or normal.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Yo mama so fat.

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What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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Whats on my leg? A pimple. What is it doing? Releasing a white/clear puss.

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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here kitty kitty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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