why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

jd and zach loves vigina

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

thumb_up thumb_down -14

i was scrolling through the anti-jokes and saw one that just said refridgerator. i laughed. penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the purple horse say to the goat? horses don't talk....

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Im Harold Camping.... and i enjoy scaring the shit out of you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree Because the post man threw a fridge at it

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops