What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

What did the monkey say to the receptionist? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Red are roses, blue are violets I'm dislexic.

What's red and smells like metal? A tricycle. It's covered in blood.

What is the difference between John and John Nothing

What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

Q.How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A.You don't. You kill her.

Oh my God! A talking dog!

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

What is the difference between a duck and a cow? One is an aquatic fowl and the other is a farmland mammal.

poop.

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

Why didn't the sperm cell cross the road? It died from the intense heat.

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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