What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

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Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

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I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

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Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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Knock knock Who's There? Me I kill you again HA HA HA

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Face...tastes like chicken!

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

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Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

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What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

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Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Connor is homo

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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