Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

What did the nerd say to the cheerleader? Wouldn't you like to know? Mind your own business.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin "Boy, it sure is getting hot in here," and the other muffin replies "yeah, that's because it's an oven."

Committing Suicide #YOLO

What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

"If life was fair, I would have a girlfriend" - William Deane

what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...