A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags

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A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

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Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."

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Q: What's green and goes round and round and round? A: A baby on a blender

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How many pairs of jordans does your dad have? None, he lost both his legs in vietnam.

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person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

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Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

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What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a penis

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Me

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

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What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

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Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

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Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

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Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

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Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

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do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops