How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

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Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

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Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

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whats more serious than rape the holocaust

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Women's rights.

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Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Cause he wanted to

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

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what did the man say to his wife? I love you

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why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

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Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

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Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

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What is short and yellow? Most Asians

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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Why was the black man very rich? Because he was a lawyer who worked hard and was able to provide himself with a steady income.

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

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Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

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What happened to the cow that couldn't moo? It died because it could not make it's needs known to it's fellow herd and was bullied and isolated.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops