What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

What did the Jew get for Christmas ....... An ashtray

A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

what's purple and plastic purple plastic

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

You can go out to eat without posting it on Facebook.

when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

what do you call a professional gamer Their name

drew edminstin is a rat

What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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