What's Black, White, and Red all over? A Cow in a giant blender...

Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

What do you call a bloody Jewish guy nailed to a piece of wood. Jesus

Yo mama's so fat she has diabetes.

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

Why did the chicken croos the road? He was battling severe depression at the time. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart, he was declining in job performance and his boss threatened to fire him several times. I guess at that point he just decided to end it all. It was horribly tragic, policemen knocking on the door of his wife's chicken roost and informing her of the bad news. As soon as she heard, she rushed to the scene, only to see his mangled body spread across the street, intestines falling out. They held a closed casket funeral. Formal, all black. It was raining by the time the casket was brought to the cemetery to be buried. She hasn't stopped crying since. His children ask her, where's dad, but all she can do is weep. Suicide is bad, kids

why did the black guy say he was ridin' dirty? because its been weeks since he last took it to the coin op, he's busy working as an I.T Specialist.

when i'm away from home i sometimes get love sick, well they call it chlamydiae.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

An IRS agent named Harold Crick finds that he has the ability to hear a narrator comment on every moment of his life. He later becomes institutionalized in the Schizophrenic ward.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Not the case here, though.

What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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