- Anti Joke

A woman gets home from bying tampons to use later in the month. She walks into the house and sees a heart box with a note from her husband of 5 years. The note reads: Roses are red - violets are blue - Fudge Is Sweet - Heres some Fudge...........She then puts the note down, eats the fudge, and has diarrhea a few hours later. The husband comes home and feels bad because he forgot that fudge upsets his wife's stomach. Later that night the wife asks her husband to have anal sex with her. The husband agrees but later regrets his action since his dick is now discolored and smells of shit..........Two days later the family dog dies. The wife and husband mourn. I like cheese

What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't. Despite losing her arms in a terrible accident as a child, Suzy persevered to become a renowned gymnast. After several turns as a champion Special Olympian, Suzy retired from sports in order to tour elementary schools as a guest speaker. She inspired thousands of disabled children across North America and was a highly-respected orator. Suzy sadly passed away in 2009 at the age of 62. She is survived by her two lovely daughters, Karen and Michelle.

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Where's Wally? In a children's book.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

Knock Knock CUM IN!

Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

"My grandmother has AIDS. They are really nice ladies." -joke by comedian Daniel Cupps

what is orange? an orange

Roses are grey, Violets are black, I have Alzheimer's, Barthtub.

What do you call a man with ADHD ? A man with ADHD.

This is an anti-anti joke. I don't expect him to get it.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" Of course not.

What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

What's big, moves around everywhere, and has four wheels? four TEENS on four wheelers

What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

Roses are red, Violets are violet,

What did one pile of dirt say to the other pile of dirt?? You're dirty

What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??