What's up? Not the Twin Towers.

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a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

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Yo Mama just died.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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What goes up but never comes down? This dick

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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Q:why was steve sad? A:he had an extra penis

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Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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Get it? More.

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops