How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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What's the difference between men and coca-cola? I don't like coca-cola

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800 people died last year. end of story

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

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Guns dont kill people...whoever pulled the trigger kills people

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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