How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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why didn't the boy go to school because he died last night

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Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

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Why couldn't little Jimmy see his mum in the crowd? Because he was blind.

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why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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there is a fat ass bitch who lives in littlefield TX, her name...Krista. her facebook.... NannyGrizzly. I hate her!!! with a pasion... she was my neighbor... i can hear her yelling all the time. Please... someone give her a reason to yell. .................Facebook..........Nannygrizzly.......do....something.....about.......her.... thank you. Ima TROLE!!!!! hahahahaahhhahahahahahahaahha. damn it. (: v P PS. she is a bitch

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If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5... that's $10.

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Q:What's the difference between a turtle and a cat? A: One's a turtle and the other is a cat....

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what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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FUCK YOU

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what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

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What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

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#IsaiahAfterAD&B

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A jew walks into a bar and asked for 5 shots the bartender replies to him "did you and your wife have a fight" "yeah now shes atheist"

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what is yellow and burns? -a fire

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

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Im good at other things... ...like giving handshakes

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Sometimes i'm hungry.

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Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops