Two guys walk into a bar, and they ordered two drinks. Then the bartender said, "Two dollars, please." - Brandie PANG

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Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

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how does a a fat person dance? with his feet

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Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

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whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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Q-how many dead babies does it take to paint your geradge door? A-one if you throw it hard enough

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Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

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When geese fly in the "V" shape, why is one side longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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(PC) What did the homosexual man say when accidently sat on a stick? Ouch.

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what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

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Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

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There once was a man named Trevor. Trevor was walking casually through the forest one day. All of a sudden, a wolf leapt out from the trees. The wolf said, in a harsh voice, "Hey man! This is my patch". But then Trevor woke up and realised that his hallucinations were symptoms of a degenerative brain disease.

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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