Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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What did the teenage girl get for her birthday? Pregnant.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

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What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

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how many girlfriends does robert dupra have? none becomes his sister doesn't count trololololol

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What do you get when you cross batman and superman? One egotesticul idiot SOB aka mofo ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? you wave.

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What's an anti joke? Then I ate my digestive biscuit.

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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Kevin Spacey is Kaiser Solze

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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