A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

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If you watch a pregnancy backwards, it is about a baby that is inserted between the legs of a woman and is slowly broken down for energy and the remains are finally sucked up by a man's genitals. There isn't a joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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it's funny because it's funny

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Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

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How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

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what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. They both died of blood loss.

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You think I'm pretty without any makeup boy..... Let's bang.

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The Charlotte Bobcats

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops