Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

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Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

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A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

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Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

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Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

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FUS RO DAH!!!

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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