What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

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why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

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Is there anything better than pussy? Ya a really nice book

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Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

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What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

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Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

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What did Katniss say to her sister? hi

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Ring around the rosy. A pocket full of posies. Ashes. Ashes. I just set a dead baby on fire.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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If life hands you melons, you might be dyslexic.

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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who's getting there balls chopped off by lilly? Nemo

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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woman's rights

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what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and his problem is destroying his family.

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops