What did the black guy say to the japanese ninja with super fighting skills? Nothing, because he neck was sliced before he could.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -22

There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Bill Walters from across the street. How are we talking through a door?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the man and woman have sex? To have a good time, but the man's condom failed and they ended up with a deformed baby because they were brother and sister. Those are your parents. Enjoy

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops