Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

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Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

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Where did the AIDS victim go on vacation? To the hospital.

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Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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what is orange red and blue, has wheels , and can talk? i don't know that's why i asked you

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

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What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

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I once saw a fat child eating a sandwich. I wondered what was inside.

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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You: What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? Person: A towel?! You: No, an aquaphilian woman drying off a car ;)

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Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A victim of animal cruelty.

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Knock Knock! Whos there? The Game!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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