When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

How do u make a hockey player cry You Kill his entire family

a jerk that i knew was in a bar. he was about to drive home. at first i tried to stop him until he was sober. instead he punched me in the face. then i dared him to drive home as fast as possible. he died that night... i texted him all the way...

Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

Poop.

Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

I was once a hamster.

What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

Women's rights

The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

gay pom...

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

What has no eyes no arms no legs and the lack of a brain? You for liking this joke

Where there is a will, there is generally a grieving family... I miss you, dad.

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

Why are black people so ghetto? because they live in the ghetto

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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