What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you make a little boy cry? You rape his dog

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

thumb_up thumb_down -11

This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I have a toaster. I have two subway coupons and a handful of pubic hair equal trade baby

thumb_up thumb_down -13

look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

thumb_up thumb_down -13

derp

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the octopus say to the squid? Nothing, considering these two species can't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If it bothers you? I am just saying that, fucking alright ill be slightly less cruel, I mean come on! It does not matter shit what others think! If someone ever tries to assault you because you are associated with me (yeah it happens), I will stand in front of you and KILL (and possibly rape) THEM!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When black people wore their pants low, white people called it "Saggin" little did they know that "saggin" spelled backwards is "white supremacy" those sneaky white people

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops