- Anti Joke

1. Go to the WRITE YOUR OWN! section on this website. 2. Check the box on "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service." 3. The Submit button should become available for clicking. 4. Now uncheck the box. 5. Thumbs up if the Submit button is still available. -BG_Shank_A

Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the US. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

HALF LIFE 4 COMING OUT SOON!

how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

Hi

What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

knock knock, Whos there ? ( runs away ) trololololololololol

What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

wetly sucks dick just like teh boowb

What do you call a poldo thats hafl poldo a

A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I lost The Game, You just did too.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

Women. One of the genders a human can be.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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