What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

bish bash bosh giz a nosh

obama

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGH

What did Chuck Norris say when he stubbed his toe? "Oh shit I stubbed my toe."

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

Q: What did ine sweaty arab man say to the other sweaty arab man? A: "I'm sweaty"

Why did the young boy lose a testicle? Because he was viciously raped by a large parrot

What was that pirate movie rated? PG-13

Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...