Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

what do you say to a black guy on steroids? B!tch please

roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

what is worst than 1 bee stings two bee stings what is worst than two bee stings holocaust what is worse than three bee stings getting raped by a giant scorpion

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

What is white and can't climb trees? Powdered sugar.

When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

How did the blonde die raking leaves? She fell out of the tree!

A guy walks into a bar and doesn't buy a 12 pack of coke, pepsi is better but he didn't have enough money to buy either.

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

i just pooped that is all!

I may have alzheimer's but at least I don't have alzheimer's.

What happens when you shoot Chuck Norris? You go to jail.

Jolly Rancher the particle beam is in the alpha quadrant and we are good to go.Please confirm receipt of this communique. Cell Leader Iqbal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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