Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

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Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

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Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

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I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

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i didn't listen to a word you just said but...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

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poop

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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In some aspects, a fowl can be compared by many points to the Tyrannosaurus. But it is still comestible.

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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One dog says to the other dog "Nice day, isn't it?" The other dog says "You can talk!?"

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Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

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Why did the chicken contact Michael Jackson? To get to the other side.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Her father beat her

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

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What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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What did the fish say when it was being fried? That's crazy, fish can't talk.

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what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops