Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

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What do Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen have in common? They are both celebrities.

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why did the blind man crash his car? he had down syndrome.

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just imagine like a whole mark no imagine like 1000 marks an army of marks ready to conquer

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Yd the chicken cross the road? To SAVE THE WORLD

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Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, It is also the material Aodhan's house is made from.

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4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

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A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

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No

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Hey, austin, what are you doing?

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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A father was angry at his daughter's boyfriend because he took her virginity. The boyfriend said he was ashamed that he never told her he has AIDS.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? He has flourished throughout his musical career and is a very accomplished man, as he has won many Grammys

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TIMMY

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

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What's brown and sticky? A Stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops