every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride?

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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Who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? The same Griffin Kid.

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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knock knock, Whos there ? ( runs away ) trololololololololol

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A second Holocaust. What's worse than a second Holocaust? Being raped by Santa Claus. What's worse than that? NOTHING.

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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im typkiking wifrh myv troes. Sorry, i was typing with my toes.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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Why did the boy commit scuicide? Because he was mentaly scared due to constant tormenting and teasing from his friends

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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Whats worse then 15 missed calls from your mom?, The Holocaust

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What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

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How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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2 men were friends 1 went to hell The other went to heaven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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