Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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why did the black man attend the AA meeting? his wife told him the only way she would stay with him is if he would attend these meetings, he was an alcoholic and is dying of liver failure.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait; it would be quite unsanitary to talk about my genitals in front of you.

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What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Apple juice.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

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Why did the guy crash? He was texting.

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Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

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A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

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being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

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There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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What's brown and sticky? A Stick

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Amazing

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Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

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Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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