Rebecca Black walks into a bar and gets shot.

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The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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What is blue and flies across the room? A baby with a punctured lung.

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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what does a granny look best in? 1950

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a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

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Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

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Why did Ian pass his CRB check? Because he committed his crimes on holiday

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

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Hey! Where is my tracker?

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to properly balance himself.

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What's the difference between a baby and hot dog? I don't put ketchup on my hot dog when I eat it.

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Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... *Sigh*

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

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So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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