What's sad about 5 black men falling off a cliff? The master has no slaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to your hamster? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is funnier than 24? 25! hahahahahaha!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What has eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs face.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the old man drop his milk? He had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened after jimmy cheated on a test. Jimmy went home.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

- What is worse than a baby in a trash bin ? - A baby in five trash bins.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do u call a Mexican on the moon? An astronaut. What do u call all the Mexicans on the moon? Problem solved!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If you can't read this, you should think about optical enhancement surgery. If you can, however, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life doing so.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one who? Cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having your entire family killed in a car accident

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops