yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

Roses aren't Red and Violet aren't Blue, do you know why i even like you

Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

whats white and pointless? chalk.

roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

Why is Islam the fastest growing religion? Because black people breed like rats.

♪ It's raining. It's pouring. ♪ The old man caught pneumonia and died....

how hight is a china man ? derr his name is how high and he is a china man

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

Your mom is so fat, that last night after reading and edition of Cosmo, she skipped dinner and cried herself to sleep due to her inability to live up to such an unrealistic feminine stereotype.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a WAFFLE!

My two friends Larry and Paul are both race horses. They were getting ready for a big race to quolify them for the Kentucky durby. BANG! The race started! What. Close race! First it was Larry then Paul then Larry then Paul! And finally Larry came out and won it! Paul went to the winners circle and congratulated Larry. He said "hey great job Larry but next time after you come back from touring will you let me win?" Larry says "oh! Of course this couldn't get between us! We're like two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket. We're best friends"... So when he came back from touring Larry said it was great! And promised let Paul win. BANG the race started! It was Paul then Larry then Paul then Larry won again. Paul was a little mad that he he didn't win but he went to congratulate larry anyway. Larry said next time he was deffinetly going to let Paul win, because he wasn't gonna let this get between them because they are two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket, they are best friends. Then after Larry came back from touring he promised again he would let Paul win. BANG! The race started and it was Paul then Larry! Then Paul! Larry! Paul! Then larry won. Paul at this point furious went to the winners circle. He talked to Larry "Larry why didn't you let me win for the third time!? This is just your ego trying to win every time now!?" I didn't want them to fight so I chimed in "Larry, Paul! Please don't fight! Your two peas in a pod! Closer then bread in a basket! Your best friends!! You don't want to fight like this!" Larry turned to Paul and said "Hey look! A talking dog!"

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

Yo mamas so fat.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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