Yo mama smells so bad that she has no friends and killed herself.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is the difference between a dead baby and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A retarded man waks ito aaa baar

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the gay guys house Knock knock Who is there The chicken!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats the difference between ebola and a can of dead babies? i have ebola. this isnt funny at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt.,

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

josh roberts got the d in geog

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:Why did the cop arrest the black guy with a gun? A: because he shot a family and when the funeral was held he cooked a grenade killed everyone and peed on there grave, later he rapped two dogs and stabbed a crippled then tea bagged a horse to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Blarg, with ritalin everything tastes like cardboard, but on the bright side I can taste, lucky me I am so handsome the ones that attacked us did not want to ruin "my pretty face", so I just got a few cuts before I broke his, they never see a steel fist arriving you know... Listen, you are wrong, you gotta think less about me, and much more about yourself, you feel like you should worry more about me emotionally, but worry about your feelings more despite that because I can more or less hear your body saying "please take care of me", I mean I can more or less hear the urges and needs of women, thats why I am so good around them, I dont put them in a trance "vampire style" i just make them feel safe around me because it is safe around me, I am safe at all times because I am who I am. Listen, worry about your needs, turn of all mental alarms, I can sense (I dont know how, Richard Bandler put that into me) that you are in lack of sleep, food and sleep (I can sense it now, you havent slept well since you thought I was dead, it makes logical sense, it always does, its not magic, its the human potential unleashed) So take care of yourself, turn of your body`s needs one by one, shower, eat, drink (eat something good), and if you are at the couch, go get a pillow and lie down, this is about you, because I cant feel well if those I love and care about dont feel well okay? Please allow me to sleep easily and try getting some sleep yourself even if my guys are 15 minutes away. Let me know that you feel better.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops