How does santa deliver presents? He doesn't, because he's not real!

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If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

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What do you call a dumb blonde with no hair? You don't, since there is no way of knowing that she is blonde.

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Womens rights

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

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what do they do to dead Mexicans? skin them and make them in to wet suites.

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Once upon a time, there was a man. He was black. The end.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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There's a Korean Black person and a Mexican on a cliff who jumps first? Who Cares

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? He was furious because it was the fourth time that week that it failed to wake him up for school, and he was going to be late again.

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oh my god! what? i heard this joke the other day and it was hilarious. ok, tell me? actually it doesn't matter i can't remember anyway.

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

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Your mom is so stupid, that she took an IQ test and was proven mentally retarded. Her family is devastated.

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Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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your mother is so fat that she eats a lot of high fat foods.

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

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A Jewish man, black guy, and asian all walk into a bar. Can you guess which one got arrested? That's right, the criminal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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