There was a hundred dollar note lying flat on the ground. The homeless guy didn't pick it up and walked on because he didn't see it.

s o m a a d i t u n y s n i t a c s d c ' s k h k s t o e l y e

Whats Big, black, and in your moms underwesar? A snake that escaped from a pet store which is causing a lot of commotion in the local community. Meanwhile your mom is getting drilled by a big psycho who escaped the mental institution. JMM

boo

Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

tuna fish dolphins sharks idk

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have alzheimer's Bacon

Roses are gray Violets are gray ROFL I'm a dog

What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

Knock knock *the family is on vacation and doesn't answer*

Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

Two elks were out flying one day. One of the elks turned to the other one and said: - You have a cinnemon bun in your eye. - What? - You have a cinnamon bun in your eye! - WHAT? - YOU HAVE A CINNAMON BUN IN YOUR EYE!!! - I CAN'T HEAR YOU, I HAVE A CINNAMON BUN IN MY EYE!

Why do so many Koreans go to medical school? Practicing medicine is a rewarding and respected career.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like trains (:

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

potatoes

What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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