Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

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A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Four blondes are driving to Disney World. When they are in Florida, there is a sign that says "Disney left" Upset, they make a u-turn and go home.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

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What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

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How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

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1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a dog

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Where's Waldo? Six feet under.

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Why did the elephants get in a taxi? They were going to the airport.

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Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

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There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

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How do you wake up your friend in a reasonable manor? you beat the shit out of him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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