the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? 4

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: whats a bunny's favorite music genre A: smooth jazz

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens when a Jew, a black man, and a Latino walk into the bar? The potential for racial humor.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's brown and dirty? Dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

sdasdadasdasd

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops