Q: What did the alcoholic get for his Birthday?\ A: A Jail Sentence

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What's green and has wheels? a green car.

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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Remember when they called online casino`s betting sport? Anti Joke potential detected. I used to play soccer and box back then, but I guess I was still not "sporty" enough for betting sports... And as thus I afforded my lawyer education. Moral: Now that you know my education, do you really think id ever type real morals here? Mwahahahaha!

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread, and loaves of bread are incapable of understanding the intricacies of fly-by-wire guidance and propulsion systems.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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Who lost World War II? The Jews.

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What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

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Question: How did the chicken get to the other side of the road? Answer: Too find his joint.

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Hi

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

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What kind of fire alarm does a zebra not like? One that doesn't work

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Q: Do you know what's the no.1 cause of pedophellia? A: Sexy kids

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"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

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Whats the most common use of a butt plug after school? In the sport of pole vaultIng, the butt plug is the rubber end of the pole that is designed to withstand the force of being planted in a steel box.

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So what makes you that much adaptable? I get the feeling I should get this by now.

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

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But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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