- Anti Joke

a man reads his wife a poem "roses are red, violets are blue, and I love you." the wife talks to her brother asking why he changed the poem he said men do that cause they love you. later that night she got pregnant.

Why did the man talk to the potato? Because hes stupid.

what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

Nicolas Cage

How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

whats worse then girls playing sport ? girls cutting grass

Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

A muslim, a jew, and a black man walk into a bar, the bartender asks what they would like to drink, after respnding, paying and receiving their drinks, they sit down to drink them. What a lovely scene of ethnic diversity

Little Johnny was always bullied at school. Everyday he would get picked on by the same kid, Todd. Todd was a red-headed bully with no discipline. Johnny one day went home and started crying. His father asked the little boy, "Jonny why are you crying?" John replied, "I keep getting bullied". His father stood up and told him, "You must become a big man and step up to him and tell him how you feel. It will surprise him and he will then back off. It always works." Johnny then felt inspired. Later that night he started practicing what he will say in the mirror. By the next morning he felt like he was ready. Johnny was confident about himself for once. He walked up to Todd and told him, "I'm tired of your bullying and next time you will regret it!!". Todd looked surprised and had his jaw opened. Todd then said, "I'm sorry Johnny I didn't know you felt that way." Johnny looked confused. "Here come with me and I'll buy us ice cream". When they went to go get ice cream, Todd brutally stabbed Johnny until he was losing blood and repeatedly raped his dead body.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

Why did no one throw a fridge at the boy on the swing? Because fridges are heavy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A penguin in a blender.

Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

why did the little boy fall over? he was hit in the face by a salmon.

Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

What's brown and smelly? Poop.

What did the engineer say to the supervisor? Hi.