Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

What do you call a mexican riding a lawnmower? Promoted

What do you call 6 dead people on your front lawn? A mass murder

I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

a jewish man walks down the street a hispanic man walks down the street a black man walks down the street an irish man walks down the street and into a pub

Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

why do woman travel in packs? because men don't travel like the sisterhood in the traveling pants

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

What's the difference between a jazz musician and a cheese pizza? A cheese pizza is a food and a jazz musician is a person.

Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

Some blind tall guy asked a rich dude about time when the rich dude looked at his klock he remembred many things in his ugly terrible life so he said to the blind guy : its 5PM

Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

when does lady gaga wake up? when she dreams about a bad romance

whats worse than finding the holocaust on your forehead? a mono brow

Why was the boy dad? Because he was taken advantage of by an older woman during ovulation and impregnated her.

What does a black person call black friday? Friday

drake

doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

I love you You love me We all grab 2X4's Barney's on the floor No more purple dinosaur.

A man walks into a bar.

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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