Knock, Knock Come in

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

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Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

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If a tree falls in a neigheorohood lots of people hear it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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What do you call the twin towers? An airport

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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My thanks to those that thumb down my comment below, you have the possibilty to become one of my over 100.000.000 members, as long as you follow your heart, your own will, we got you covered. We got over 600.000 never members since last year, you are far from alone, thumb this comment up, leave a small comment, and I shall send one of my shadows to tell you more, or online if you prefer that, but then I would need your email address... ...As for your home address? Nah, already know it just let me know if you want a visit, but during my 6000 years on earth or so, I have yet to evolve to the point where I fully understand the full nature of computers, they are very recent to me. Yet only those that are willing to follow their hearts and enact their true hidden desires without shame, guilt, remorse, but instead with love and gusto, will find the answers among us. Soon my wings shall spread, and just like that, the world is ours! Moral: "Fuck Morals, would you believe me if I said they where in code? No they are not, the secrets are only within the shadows, and the Black Angel. Nero.

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a lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for directions. the Bartender takes him into a room and rapes-him

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

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How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

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-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

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Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

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WNBA

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Why would you ever buy an antijoke book? BECAUSE ANTIJOKES ARE F***ING AWESOME!!!

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

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What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

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What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

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There's 2 cows, one says to the other "What do you think of Mad Cow Disease?" The other says, "I don't care I'm a helicopter"

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There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

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What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus. He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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