How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

thumb_up thumb_down +21

how many boys does it take to use 4 computers? 4.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

thumb_up thumb_down +21

irish wristwatch JLR

thumb_up thumb_down +21

how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

thumb_up thumb_down +21

In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Billy Cundiff.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not doing your Webtime on a Friday!!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

roses are red. violets are violet...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops